Then & Now · Volume II · 10 of 18
A Wife’s Not Going Against Her Husband’s Will (II)
A Wife’s Not Going Against Her Husband’s Will (II)
§. 33. Of the712 ſubiection of wiues in diſtributing goods to charitable vſes.
§. 33. Of the subjection of wives in distributing goods to charitable uses.*
Some that grant that a wife is ſo ſubiected to her husband in a ciuill manner, as ſhe may not diſpoſe any part of his goods at her pleaſure to any ciuill vſe, denie this ſubiection to extend to giuing of almes, and ſuch like charitable vſes.
- 712. Treat. 4. §. 54. [moved in the edition]
Some that grant that a wife is so subjected to her husband in a civil manner, as she may not dispose any part of his goods at her pleasure to any civil use, deny this subjection to extend to giving of alms, and such like charitable uses.
- 712. Treat. 4. §. 54. [moved here by the editor]
Before I come to determine this queſtion, let it be remembred, that it was before granted, that713 ordinarie dutie muſt giue place to extraordinarie need, ſo that releefe in preſent neceſſitie is not controuerted. Let it be alſo remembred that714 a wife may haue goods proper to her ſelfe, yea715 it ſhall be ſhewed that an husband ought according to his abilitie to commit ſomething to her diſcretion and diſpoſition: of theſe and ſuch like goods ſhe is as much bound as her husband to expend ſomething to charitable vſes: and (as God offereth occaſion)716 to reach forth her hand to the poore and needy.
Before I come to determine this question, let it be remembered, that it was before granted, that713 ordinary duty must give place to extraordinary need, so that relief in present necessity is not controverted. Let it be also remembered that714 a wife may have goods proper to her self, yea715 it shall be showed that an husband ought according to his ability to commit something to her discretion and disposition: of these and such like goods she is as much bound as her husband to expend something to charitable uses: and (as God offereth occasion) to reach forth her hand to the poor and needy.716
Yea further let this be premiſed, that in caſe a wife be forbidden or reſtrained by her husband, ſhe ought to vſe all the good meanes ſhe can by her ſelfe and her friends to moue her husband to grant her ſome libertie, that ſhe may haue ſome triall of her mercifull and charitable diſpoſition: if herein ſhe cannot preuaile, then ſhe ought to make knowne vnto her husband ſuch perſons caſes as ſhe thinkes meet to be releeued, and vſe all the motiues ſhe can to perſwade him to afford them ſome releefe.
Yea further let this be premised, that in case a wife be forbidden or restrained by her husband, she ought to use all the good means she can by her self and her friends to move her husband to grant her some liberty, that she may have some trial of her merciful and charitable disposition: if herein she cannot prevail, then she ought to make known unto her husband such persons cases as she thinks meet to be relieved, and use all the motives she can to persuade him to afford them some relief.
But put the caſe a wiſe, religious, mercifull wife, be maried717 to a couetous worldling, who though he haue wit, and vnderſtanding enough to manage ciuill affaires, and to prouide for the outward temporall eſtate of the houſe, yet hath no heart to releeue the poore, and is not only vnwilling himſelfe to doe good in that kinde, but will not ſuffer his wife to doe it, whether may a wife priuilie take of ſuch goods as he hath reſerued to his owne diſpoſing, and ſimply without any kinde of conſent diſtribute them to charitable vſes, or though he expreſly forbid her, yet directly againſt his conſent diſpoſe them?
- 717. State of queſtion.
But put the case a wise, religious, merciful wife, be married717 to a covetous worldling, who though he have wit, and understanding enough to manage civil affairs, and to provide for the outward temporal estate of the house, yet hath no heart to relieve the poor, and is not only unwilling himself to do good in that kind, but will not suffer his wife to do it, whether may a wife privily take of such goods as he hath reserved to his own disposing, and simply without any kind of consent distribute them to charitable uses, or though he expressly forbid her, yet directly against his consent dispose them?
- 717. State of question.
p. 305 With reuerend reſpect to better iudgements, I thinke ſhe may718 not (except before excepted.) For it being before proued in generall, that ſhe had no ſuch liberty in diſpoſing goods, I cannot ſee how this particular end of giuing almes can diſpence with her generall ſubiection in euery thing, except there were ſome particular warrant for it in Gods word.
- 718. Non excuſabit bona intentio vxoris, etiamſi ea acciperet ad eleemoſynam faciendam. Greg. Sayr. clav. reg. lib. 9. cap. 16.
With reverend respect to better judgments, I think she may718 not (except before excepted.) For it being before proved in general, that she had no such liberty in disposing goods, I cannot see how this particular end of giving alms can dispense with her general subjection in every thing, except there were some particular warrant for it in God’s word.
- 718. Non excusabit bona intentio vxoris, etiamsi ea acciperet ad eleemosynam faciendam. Greg. Sayr. clav. reg. lib. 9. cap. 16.
§. 34. Of generall exhortations to works of mercy. How far they binde wiues.
§. 34. Of general exhortations to works of mercy. How far they bind wives.
Obiect. The many generall exhortations vnto workes of mercy, which without limitation to any particular perſons, are indefinitely directed to all, doe giue ſufficient warrant to wiues: ſuch as theſe,719 Giue almes.720 Let vs doe good.721 To diſtribute forget not, &c.
Anſw. All theſe are ſtrong motiues to prouoke wiues to be mercifull and charitable in ſuch things as they may, by any means with their husbands conſent, or in ſuch things as by their huſbands are giuen to them. Yea alſo they are ſtrong motiues to prouoke husbands to allow them liberty to giue almes. But in the caſe propounded they giue no liberty to wiues: for it is a ruled caſe laid downe by Chriſt himſelfe, that workes of charity muſt be done, and almes muſt be giuen of ſuch things722 as we haue, or which are in our power to giue. Now if the husband will not giue her that power, ſhe hath not power to giue, and ſo is excuſed.723 In this caſe her true will, and her faithfull and earneſt deſire ſhall be accepted for the deed, according to that which the Apoſtle ſaith, if there be firſt a willing minde, it is accepted according to that a man hath, and not according to that he hath not. Many caſes may be giuen wherein inferiours are reſtrained from workes of mercy; as ſuppoſe a ſonne or ſeruant be deſirous to viſit one ſicke or in priſon, but his Parent or Maſter (though leaue be asked) will not ſuffer him, but charge him not to ſtirre out of doores, or to goe with him another way, ſhall this ſonne or ſeruant notwithſtanding that charge, doe that worke of mercy?
Answ. All these are strong motives to provoke wives to be merciful and charitable in such things as they may, by any means with their husbands consent, or in such things as by their husbands are given to them. Yea also they are strong motives to provoke husbands to allow them liberty to give alms. But in the case propounded they give no liberty to wives: for it is a ruled case laid down by Christ himself, that works of charity must be done, and alms must be given of such things722 as we have, or which are in our power to give.723 Now if the husband will not give her that power, she hath not power to give, and so is excused. In this case her true will, and her faithful and earnest desire shall be accepted for the deed, according to that which the Apostle saith, if there be first a willing mind, it is accepted according to that a man hath, and not according to that he hath not. Many cases may be given wherein inferiors are restrained from works of mercy; as suppose a son or servant be desirous to visit one sick or in prison, but his parent or master (though leave be asked) will not suffer him, but charge him not to stir out of doors, or to go with him another way, shall this son or servant notwithstanding that charge, do that work of mercy?
§. 35. Of obedience to an husband in ſuch things as he ſinfully forbiddeth.
§. 35. Of obedience to an husband in such things as he sinfully forbiddeth.
Obiect. 2. This reſtraint is not in the Lord, but rather againſt him and his word, therefore a wife is not bound thereunto.
Object. 2. This restraint is not in the Lord, but rather against him and his word, therefore a wife is not bound thereunto.
Anſw. Though the husband ſinne in reſtraining his wife, yet p. 306 ſhee in that reſtraint may obey, and that in the Lord: becauſe the Lord who hath commanded her to be ſubiect in euery thing, hath no where warranted her not to be ſubiect in this particular. It is expreſly ſaid in the law concerning a wiues vowes, that if her huſband breake them after he hath heard them, he ſhall beare her iniquity.724 Did not he then ſinne in reſtraining her, and was not ſhe guiltleſſe though ſhe yeelded to his reſtraint? The condition betwixt husbands and wiues in this caſe, is not vnlike the caſe betwixt other ſuperiours in authority, and their inferiours in ſubiection. But other inferiours may lawfully abſtaine from ſuch things as their gouernours doe ſinfully charge them to abſtaine from. For ſuppoſe a ſonne growen to be a man, liue in his fathers houſe at his fathers finding, and haue no ſet portion of his owne, and his father will not giue him leaue to beſtow any thing on charitable vſes, is he now bound to giue almes? ſhall the curſe be executed on him if he giue not? A croſſe indeed I acknowledge it to be, both to ſuch a ſonne, and alſo to a wife to be ſo reſtrained: but not a curſe or ſinne; the ſinne and curſe lieth on their head, who reſtraine them by vertue of their authority, wherein they abuſe their authority: as other gouernours may do and oft do, and yet neither liberty granted thereby to ſubiects, nor authority taken from gouernours. In this reſemblance betwixt a ſonne and a wife I deſire not to be miſtaken; for I alleadge it not to make the ſtate of a wife and a ſonne all one: but to ſhew that thoſe generall precepts of giuing almes, may haue their exceptions, as they which in particular handle that point, giue other examples. There muſt therefore be a further ground then the generall commandement of almes-giuing to proue the forenamed liberty of wiues.
- 724. Numb. 30. 16.
Answ. Though the husband sin in restraining his wife, yet she in that restraint may obey, and that in the Lord: because the Lord who hath commanded her to be subject in every thing, hath no where warranted her not to be subject in this particular. It is expressly said in the law concerning a wives vows, that if her husband break them after he hath heard them, he shall bear her iniquity.724 Did not he then sin in restraining her, and was not she guiltless though she yielded to his restraint? The condition betwixt husbands and wives in this case, is not unlike the case betwixt other superiors in authority, and their inferiors in subjection. But other inferiors may lawfully abstain from such things as their governors do sinfully charge them to abstain from. For suppose a son grown to be a man, live in his fathers house at his fathers finding, and have no set portion of his own, and his father will not give him leave to bestow any thing on charitable uses, is he now bound to give alms? Shall the curse be executed on him if he give not? A cross indeed I acknowledge it to be, both to such a son, and also to a wife to be so restrained: but not a curse or sin; the sin and curse lieth on their head, who restrain them by virtue of their authority, wherein they abuse their authority: as other governors may do and oft do, and yet neither liberty granted thereby to subjects, nor authority taken from governors. In this resemblance betwixt a son and a wife I desire not to be mistaken; for I allege it not to make the state of a wife and a son all one: but to show that those general precepts of giving alms, may have their exceptions, as they which in particular handle that point, give other examples. There must therefore be a further ground then the general commandment of alms-giving to prove the forenamed liberty of wives.
- 724. Num 30:‸16.
§. 36. Of Zipporahs caſe in circumciſing her ſonne.
§. 36. Of Zipporah’s case in circumcising her son.
Anſw. She may be an helpe in many other things, though this be out of her power: yea and in this alſo by counſell, perſwaſion, and other like meanes ſhe may be a great helpe. The caſe of Zipporah was extraordinary, and of an vrgent preſent neceſſity, euen to ſaue the life of her husband. Beſides, Moſes was of himſelfe p. 307 vnable to doe it, but willing that ſhe ſhould doe it. Now what is this to ordinarie caſes, and ſuch caſes as husbands are able enough themſelues to doe, but altogether vnwilling that it ſhould be done by their wiues?726
- 726. Factum Zephorae ſingulare eſt, & extraordinarium, neꝗ conſtat illud ſimpliciter à Deo approbatum fuiſſe. Simler. in Exod. 4. Luke 8. 3.
Answ. She may be an help in many other things, though this be out of her power: yea and in this also by counsel, persuasion, and other like means she may be a great help. The case of Zipporah was extraordinary, and of an urgent present necessity, even to save the life of her husband. Besides, Moses was of himself unable to do it, but willing that she should do it. Now what is this to ordinary cases, and such cases as husbands are able enough themselves to do, but altogether unwilling that it should be done by their wives?726
- 726. Factum Zephorae singulare est, & extraordinarium, neque constat illud simpliciter à Deo approbatum fuisse. Simler. in Exod. 4. Luke 8:‸3.
But what if Zipporahs example herein be not warrantable? for it doth not appeare that it was ſimply approued of God: God doth oft remoue temporary iudgements for the very workes ſake that is done, though in the manner it be ſinfully done. Inſtance the repentance of Ahab, 1. King. 21. 29.
But what if Zipporah’s example herein be not warrantable? For it doth not appear that it was simply approved of God: God doth oft remove temporary judgments for the very works sake that is done, though in the manner it be sinfully done. Instance the repentance of Ahab, 1‸ Kgs 21:‸29.
§. 37. Of the wife of Chuzas caſe in miniſtering to Chriſt.
§. 37. Of the wife of Chuza’s case in ministering to Christ.
4. Obiect. Ioanna the wife of Chuza, Herods ſteward, miniſtred vnto Chriſt of her ſubſtance without her husbands conſent.
4. Object. Joanna the wife of Chuza, Herod’s steward, ministered unto Christ of her substance without her husbands consent.
Anſw. If this could be proued it were ſomewhat to the purpoſe; but this clauſe without her husbands conſent (wherein the maine ſtate of the queſtion conſiſteth) is not in the text, nor by any good probabilitie can be gathered out of it. All the ſhew of probabilitie that can be ſhewed for it is, that Ioanna is there ſaid to be the wife of Chuza, Herods ſteward. But to ſhew that that is nothing, let it be noted,
Answ. If this could be proved it were somewhat to the purpose; but this clause without her husbands consent (wherein the main state of the question consisteth) is not in the text, nor by any good probability can be gathered out of it. All the show of probability that can be showed for it is, that Joanna is there said to be the wife of Chuza, Herod’s steward. But to show that that is nothing, let it be noted,
1. That phraſe doth not imply that Chuza was then liuing. It is ſaid that Dauid begat Salomon of the wife of Vriah, but727 Vriah was not then liuing: therefore the tranſlators for perſpicuitie ſake doe inſert theſe words (her that had beene) the wife of Vriah. So likewiſe Onan is commanded to goe in to his728 brothers wife, yet doth not this imply that his brother was then liuing.
1. That phrase doth not imply that Chuza was then living. It is said that David begat Solomon of the wife of Uriah,727 but Uriah was not then living: therefore the translators for perspicuity sake do insert these words (her that had been) the wife of Uriah. So likewise Onan is commanded to go in to his728 brothers wife, yet doth not this imply that his brother was then living.
Obiect. Why ſhould mention be made of Chuza, Herods ſteward, if he were not then liuing?
Object. Why should mention be made of Chuza, Herod’s steward, if he were not then living?
I doe not here directly affirme that Chuza was then dead, but for ought that this phraſe doth imply, he might be dead.
I do not here directly affirm that Chuza was then dead, but for ought that this phrase doth imply, he might be dead.
I doe not certainly determine any of theſe expreſly to be ſo, I doe but note them as probabilities, yet ſuch as doe ſufficiently ouerthrow the ſurmiſed libertie of a wife in giuing almes without any conſent of her husband: for this of all other probabilities ſeemeth to be moſt improbable. Into my heart it can neuer enter to imagine that Chriſt would giue ſuch an occaſion of ſlander vnto his enemies, as to ſay he caried about with him other mens wiues, without or againſt the conſent of their husbands, and ſuffered them to ſpend the goods of their huſbands vpon him. I had much rather thinke that either ſuch women as followed him had no husbands liuing, or if they had, that they did that which they did with the conſent of their husbands.
I do not certainly determine any of these expressly to be so, I do but note them as probabilities, yet such as do sufficiently overthrow the surmised liberty of a wife in giving alms without any consent of her husband: for this of all other probabilities seemeth to be most improbable. Into my heart it can never enter to imagine that Christ would give such an occasion of slander unto his enemies, as to say he carried about with him other men’s wives, without or against the consent of their husbands, and suffered them to spend the goods of their husbands upon him. I had much rather think that either such women as followed him had no husbands living, or if they had, that they did that which they did with the consent of their husbands.
§. 38. Of the732 reſtraint of wiues about allowance for themſelues or families without their husbands conſent.
§. 38. Of the restraint of wives about allowance for themselves or families without their husbands consent.*
That which hath hitherto beene deliuered concerning a wiues ſubiection in diſpoſing goods, may alſo be applied to other things concerning her ſelfe, children, ſeruants, &c. whereof I will giue ſome examples.
- 732. Treat. 4. §. 18. 52. [moved in the edition]
That which hath hitherto been delivered concerning a wives subjection in disposing goods, may also be applied to other things concerning her self, children, servants, etc‸. Whereof I will give some examples.
- 732. Treat. 4. §. 18. 52. [moved here by the editor]
A wife hath not power to appoint what ſhe liſt her ſelfe without or againſt her husbands conſent, either for her owne allowance, or for her family; ſhe muſt rather reſt ſatisfied with that which he appointeth: for he being the head, muſt haue the ouer-ruling ſtroake therein. Beſides he better knoweth what may be afforded.
A wife hath not power to appoint what she list her self without or against her husbands consent, either for her own allowance, or for her family; she must rather rest satisfied with that which he appointeth: for he being the head, must have the over-ruling stroke therein. Besides he better knoweth what may be afforded.
Queſt. What if an husband make himſelfe poorer then he is: and the allowance which he appointeth be meaner then his meanes, and vnbeſeeming his place and ſtate?
Quest. What if an husband make himself poorer then he is: and the allowance which he appointeth be meaner then his means, and unbeseeming his place and state?
Anſw. She ought, if poſſiby ſhe can by her owne inſtant perſwaſion, or any other faire meanes, moue him to that which tendeth to his honour and reputation: but if ſhe can p. 309 no way preuaile, her ſubiection requireth contentment and patience.
Answ. She ought, if possibly she can by her own instant persuasion, or any other fair means, move him to that which tendeth to his honour and reputation: but if she can no way prevail, her subjection requireth contentment and patience.
§. 39. Of a wiues733 ſubiection to her husband about children.
§. 39. Of a wives subjection to her husband about children.733
A wife may not ſimply without, or directly againſt her huſbands conſent, order and diſpoſe of the children in giuing them names, apparelling their bodies, appointing their callings, places of bringing vp, mariages, or portions.
- 733. Treat 4. §. 18. [moved in the edition]
A wife may not simply without, or directly against her husbands consent, order and dispose of the children in giving them names, apparelling their bodies, appointing their callings, places of bringing up, marriages, or portions.
- 733. Treat. 4. §. 18. [moved here by the editor]
1. For giuing names to children, beſides that it is throughout734 the Scripture for the moſt part enioyned to the husband, as to735 Abraham, to736 Zacharias, and to others, and that accordingly husbands haue ordinarily done, as737 Adam,738 Lamech,739 Abraham, and others. It is to be noted that when there was a difference betwixt the man and his wife in giuing a childes name, he giuing one name, ſhe another, the name which he gaue, ſtood; though740 Rachel named her youngeſt ſonne Benoni, yet Beniamin (which name Iaakob gaue) was the childes name. So alſo when741 Elizabeth told her friends that her childes name muſt be Iohn, they would not reſt therein, till Zacharias had ratified that name. Yea though Ioſeph were but the ſuppoſed father of Ieſus, yet becauſe he was the huſband of Mary the mother of Ieſus,742 he had this honour giuen him, to giue the name vnto her childe.
1. For giving names to children, besides that it is throughout734 the Scripture for the most part enjoined to the husband, as to Abraham,735 to Zacharias,736 and to others, and that accordingly husbands have ordinarily done, as Adam,737 Lamech,738 Abraham,739 and others. It is to be noted that when there was a difference betwixt the man and his wife in giving a childs name, he giving one name, she another, the name which he gave, stood; though Rachel740 named her youngest son Benoni, yet Benjamin (which name Jacob gave) was the childs name. So also when Elizabeth741 told her friends that her childs name must be John, they would not rest therein, till Zacharias had ratified that name. Yea though Joseph were but the supposed father of Jesus, yet because he was the husband of Mary the mother of Jesus,742 he had this honour given him, to give the name unto her child.
- 734. 1. Names.
- 735. Gen‸ 17:‸19. [moved here by the editor]
- 736. Luke 1:‸13. [moved here by the editor]
- 737. Gen‸ 5:‸3. [moved here by the editor]
- 738. Gen 5:29. [moved here by the editor]
- 739. Gen 21:‸3. [moved here by the editor]
- 740. Gen‸ 35:‸18. [moved here by the editor]
- 741. Luke 1:‸62. [moved here by the editor]
- 742. Matt 1:‸21.
2. For appointing place and mariage it is noted that745 Rebekah746 asked the conſent of her husband: though ſhe told her ſonne Iaakob that he ſhould goe to Haran to his vncle Laban to be there kept in ſafety from the fury of Eſau, yet ſhe would not ſend him till747 Iſaak had giuen his conſent for his abode there, and taking a wife from thence.
2. For appointing place and marriage it is noted that Rebekah745746 asked the consent of her husband: though she told her son Jacob that he should go to Haran to his uncle Laban to be there kept in safety from the fury of Esau, yet she would not send him till Isaac747 had given his consent for his abode there, and taking a wife from thence.
3. For deputing vnto a calling, it is noted of748 Annah, that749 though before her childe was borne ſhe had by ſolemne vow dedicated him to the Lord, yet when the childe was borne750 ſhe asked her husbands conſent about it.751
4. That which is noted of752 Annahs carrying a little coat to p. 310 her ſonne yeare by yeare when ſhe went vp with her husband, ſheweth that ſhe did it not without her husbands conſent. Women are for the moſt part prone to pranke vp their children aboue their husbands place and calling, and therefore good reaſon that therein they ſhould be gouerned by their husbands.
- 752. 1 Sam. 2. 19. [moved in the edition]
4. That which is noted of Hannah’s carrying a little coat to her son year by year when she went up with her husband,752 showeth that she did it not without her husbands consent. Women are for the most part prone to prank up their children above their husbands place and calling, and therefore good reason that therein they should be governed by their husbands.
- 752. 1 Sam‸ 2:‸19. [moved here by the editor]
Obiect.
Object.
What if husbands be more forward to haue their children attired vainly and vnſeemely, then wiues?
What if husbands be more forward to have their children attired vainly and unseemly, then wives?
Anſw. A wife muſt doe what ſhe can to hinder it: if ſhe can no way preuaile with him, ſhe by reaſon of her ſubiection is much more excuſed, then he could be, if he would ſuffer his wife therein to haue her will.
Answ. A wife must do what she can to hinder it: if she can no way prevail with him, she by reason of her subjection is much more excused, then he could be, if he would suffer his wife therein to have her will.
§. 40. Of a wiues754 ſubiection to her husband about ordering ſeruants and beaſts.
§. 40. Of a wives subjection to her husband about ordering servants and beasts.*
If wiues muſt haue their husbands conſent in ordering and diſpoſing of their children which come out of her wombe, much more of their ſeruants.
- 754. Treat. 4. §. 18. [moved in the edition]
If wives must have their husbands consent in ordering and disposing of their children which come out of her womb, much more of their servants.
- 754. Treat. 4. §. 18. [moved here by the editor]
They may not take in, or thruſt out ſeruants againſt their husbands minde. In this point, as in many other, Sarah manifeſted her wiue-like obedience; in that755 ſhe would not deale roughly with her maid though ſhe were prouoked: much leſſe756 put her out of doores till ſhe had made the matter knowne to her husband. Though ſhe failed in the manner, yet in the thing it ſelfe ſhe is a good example. It is further noted and approued in the757 Shunemite that ſhe asked her husbands conſent about ſending a ſeruant with her.
They may not take in, or thrust out servants against their husbands mind. In this point, as in many other, Sarah manifested her wive-like obedience; in that755 she would not deal roughly with her maid though she were provoked: much less756 put her out of doors till she had made the matter known to her husband. Though she failed in the manner, yet in the thing it self she is a good example. It is further noted and approved in the757 Shunammite that she asked her husbands consent about sending a servant with her.
My meaning is not that ſuch wiues as haue ſeruants allowed them to attend vpon them ſhould aske their husbands conſent whenſoeuer they haue occaſion to vſe them; for their husbands by allowing them men for their attendance manifeſt their will and conſent that they may vſe them as they ſee occaſion: but that they ſhould not vſe and imploy their ſeruants in ſuch things as they know their husbands would diſlike, except they can gaine their husbands conſent.
My meaning is not that such wives as have servants allowed them to attend upon them should ask their husbands consent whensoever they have occasion to use them; for their husbands by allowing them men for their attendance manifest their will and consent that they may use them as they see occasion: but that they should not use and employ their servants in such things as they know their husbands would dislike, except they can gain their husbands consent.
p. 311 Againſt thoſe particulars of children and ſeruants it may be obiected, that wiues are parents of their children as well as husbands, and miſtreſſes of ſeruants as well as they maſters, and therefore haue altogether as great power ouer them as their husbands.
Against those particulars of children and servants it may be objected, that wives are parents of their children as well as husbands, and mistresses of servants as well as they masters, and therefore have altogether as great power over them as their husbands.
Anſw. Indeed if the authority of the husband come not betweene, that may be granted in relation betwixt her and them: but her power being ſubordinate to her husbands in relation to him ſhe hath not ſo great a power: the power of a wife that now we ſpeake of is directly in relation to her husband.
Answ. Indeed if the authority of the husband come not between, that may be granted in relation betwixt her and them: but her power being subordinate to her husbands in relation to him she hath not so great a power: the power of a wife that now we speak of is directly in relation to her husband.
§. 41. Of a wiues759 ſubiection in entertaining ſtrangers iournying abroad, and making vowes.
§. 41. Of a wives subjection in entertaining strangers journeying abroad, and making vows.*
If wiues may not at their pleaſure vſe the things appertaining to the houſe, much leſſe may they bring ſtrangers into the houſe and entertaine them without or againſt their huſbands conſent. The good Shunemite ſo often named as a preſident760 for good wiues, firſt asked her husbands conſent, before ſhe lodged a Prophet of the Lord.
If wives may not at their pleasure use the things appertaining to the house, much less may they bring strangers into the house and entertain them without or against their husbands consent. The good Shunammite760 so often named as a precedent for good wives, first asked her husbands consent, before she lodged a Prophet of the Lord.
As for a wiues power to make vowes, in that the law giueth an husband power to diſanull her vow when he knoweth it, it implieth that ſhe ought to haue his conſent in making it, if762 at leaſt ſhe deſire to haue it eſtabliſhed, which ſhe ought to deſire, or elſe ſhe mocketh God.
- 762. Num. 30. 9. [moved in the edition]
As for a wives power to make vows, in that the law giveth an husband power to disannul her vow when he knoweth it,762 it implieth that she ought to have his consent in making it, if at least she desire to have it established, which she ought to desire, or else she mocketh God.
- 762. Num‸ 30:‸9. [moved here by the editor]
I haue thought good to mention theſe particular points for illuſtration of a wiues ſubiection, becauſe they are all of them grounded on Gods word: many other might be added to them, but theſe are ſufficient.
I have thought good to mention these particular points for illustration of a wives subjection, because they are all of them grounded on God’s word: many other might be added to them, but these are sufficient.
§. 42. Of aberrations contrary to a wiues ſubiection in doing things without or againſt their husbands conſent.
§. 42. Of aberrations contrary to a wives subjection in doing things without or against their husbands consent.
Now conſider we the vſuall vices and aberrations contrary to thoſe duties: the generall ſumme of all is, for a wife to take on her to doe what ſhe liſt, whether her husband will or no, either not willing that he ſhould know what ſhe doth, or not caring though it be againſt his minde and will. Of this ſort are
Now consider we the usual vices and aberrations contrary to those duties: the general sum of all is, for a wife to take on her to do what she list, whether her husband will or no, either not willing that he should know what she doth, or not caring though it be against his mind and will. Of this sort are
1. Such as priuily take money out of their husbands cloſets,763 counters, or other like places where he laieth it, neuer telling him of it, nor willing that he ſhould know it: likewiſe ſuch as after the like manner take ware out of the ſhop, corne out of the garner, ſheepe out of the flocke, or any other goods to ſell and make money of: or to giue away, or otherwiſe to vſe ſo as their husbands ſhall neuer know, if they can hinder it. Such wiues herein ſinne hainouſly, and that in many reſpects.
- 763. 1. Priuy purloyning huſbands goods.
1. Such as privily take money out of their husbands closets,763 counters, or other like places where he layeth it, never telling him of it, nor willing that he should know it: likewise such as after the like manner take ware out of the shop, corn out of the garner, sheep out of the flock, or any other goods to sell and make money of: or to give away, or otherwise to use so as their husbands shall never know, if they can hinder it. Such wives herein sin heinously, and that in many respects.
- 763. 1. Privy purloining husbands goods.
Firſt they diſobey the ordinance of God in a maine branch of their particular calling, which is ſubiection.
First they disobey the ordinance of God in a main branch of their particular calling, which is subjection.
2. They ill repay the care and paines which their husbands take for their good. Many ſuch wiues recompence euill for good, which is a deuilliſh qualitie.
2. They ill repay the care and pains which their husbands take for their good. Many such wives recompense evil for good, which is a devilish quality.
3. They are oft a meanes to impaire and impoueriſh their husbands eſtate.
3. They are oft a means to impair and impoverish their husbands estate.
4. They ſhew themſelues no better then764 pilfring theeues thereby. All that can be iuſtly and truly ſaid for their right in the common goods, cannot defend them from the guilt of theft: they are the more dangerous by how much the more they are truſted, and leſſe ſuſpected: and their fact is ſo much the more hainous by how much the more deere their husbands ought to be vnto them.
- 764. Si vxor ex bonis communibus ſine viri licentia ſaltem praeſumpta accipiat, verè furtum committit. Greg. Sayr. clau. reg. l. 9. c. 16.
4. They show themselves no better then764 pilfering thieves thereby. All that can be justly and truly said for their right in the common goods, cannot defend them from the guilt of theft: they are the more dangerous by how much the more they are trusted, and less suspected: and their fact is so much the more heinous by how much the more dear their husbands ought to be unto them.
- 764. Si vxor ex bonis communibus sine viri licentia saltem praesumpta accipiat, verè furtum committit. Greg. Sayr. clau. reg. l. 9. c. 16.
5. They are a verie ill example to other inferiours in the houſe, for ſeldome hath a man a deceitfull wife, but ſome of the children or ſeruants, are made acceſſarie thereunto, being made her inſtruments to take the goods, and beſtow them as ſhe ordereth, and ſo are made vnfaithfull.
5. They are a very ill example to other inferiors in the house, for seldom hath a man a deceitful wife, but some of the children or servants, are made accessary thereunto, being made her instruments to take the goods, and bestow them as she ordereth, and so are made unfaithful.
6. They make themſelues ſlaues to their owne children and p. 313 ſeruants, whom they dare not diſpleaſe, leſt they ſhould tell what was done.
6. They make themselves slaves to their own children and servants, whom they dare not displease, lest they should tell what was done.
7. They teach their children and ſeruants to be theeues: for beſides that ſuch as are vſed by their miſtreſſes to purloine for them, are thereby made acceſſarie to their ſinne, they will alſo purloine for themſelues, when their miſtreſſes ſhall not know. So as what with the wiues purloining one way, and the childrens or ſeruants another way, a mans eſtate may be waſted as dew before the Sunne, and he not know which way.
7. They teach their children and servants to be thieves: for besides that such as are used by their mistresses to purloin for them, are thereby made accessary to their sin, they will also purloin for themselves, when their mistresses shall not know. So as what with the wives purloining one way, and the children’s or servants another way, a man’s estate may be wasted as dew before the Sun, and he not know which way.
2. Such as will haue what allowance they thinke beſt for765 themſelues and family, and ſcornfully ſay, They will not be at their husbands finding: they know beſt what allowance is fitteſt for the family, and that it ſhall haue. Many will make their huſbands eare tingle againe, yea and make the whole houſe (if not the ſtreet alſo) ring of it, if they thinke their allowance be not anſwerable to the vttermoſt extent of their husbands eſtate. This impatiencie and inſolencie, as it croſſeth Gods ordinance, ſo it maketh both their liues vncomfortable.
- 765. 2. Taking what allowance they liſt.
2. Such as will have what allowance they think best for765 themselves and family, and scornfully say, They will not be at their husbands finding: they know best what allowance is fittest for the family, and that it shall have. Many will make their husbands ear tingle again, yea and make the whole house (if not the street also) ring of it, if they think their allowance be not answerable to the uttermost extent of their husbands estate. This impatiency and insolency, as it crosseth God’s ordinance, so it maketh both their lives uncomfortable.
- 765. 2. Taking what allowance they list.
3. Such as cocker, attire, or any way bring vp their children766 otherwiſe then their husbands would, euen to the griefe and diſhonour of their husbands: keeping them at home when their husbands, for their better education, would haue them abroad: as theſe ſinne in hindring the good of their children, ſo alſo in not yeelding to their husbands.767
3. Such as cocker, attire, or any way bring up their children766 otherwise then their husbands would, even to the grief and dishonour of their husbands: keeping them at home when their husbands, for their better education, would have them abroad: as these sin in hindering the good of their children, so also in not yielding to their husbands.767
4. Such as will haue their owne will about ſeruants, taking in, and putting out whom they pleaſe, and when they pleaſe: vſing ſome ſeruants whom they finde for their turne to the preiudice of their husbands: and carying themſelues ſo ſharply768 and ſhrewiſhly to others that are for their husbands turne, as a good, truſtie, faithfull ſeruant cannot long ſtay in the houſe.
- 768. 5. Lending forth their husbands cattell.
4. Such as will have their own will about servants, taking in, and putting out whom they please, and when they please: using some servants whom they find for their turn to the prejudice of their husbands: and carrying themselves so sharply768 and shrewishly to others that are for their husbands turn, as a good, trusty, faithful servant cannot long stay in the house.
- 768. 5. Lending forth their husbands cattle.
5. Such as ſecretly lend out their husbands horſes, or other769 like cattell, more reſpecting to pleaſure a vaine friend, then to pleaſe a good husband. This fault is ſo much the greater, when it is done to the dammage and preiudice of the husband.
- 769. 6. Feaſting when their husbands ſhall not know it. Abſente marito compotationes domi ne excita. Greg. Naz. ad Olymp.
5. Such as secretly lend out their husbands horses, or other769 like cattle, more respecting to pleasure a vain friend, then to please a good husband. This fault is so much the greater, when it is done to the damage and prejudice of the husband.
- 769. 6. Feasting when their husbands shall not know it. Absente marito compotationes domi ne excita. Greg. Naz. ad Olymp.
6. Such as are then moſt frolicke and iolly, when their huſbands are furtheſt off and cannot know it. Salomon ſets it downe as a note of a ſtrumpet,770 then to tricke vp her houſe and to ſeeke for gueſts, when her husband is gone a iourney farre p. 314 off. Then ought ſhe to be moſt ſolitarie, and by abſtaining from merrie meetings, to ſhew that there can be no greater dampe to her mirth, then the abſence of her husband.
- 770. Prou. 7. 19.
6. Such as are then most frolic and jolly, when their husbands are furthest off and cannot know it. Solomon sets it down as a note of a strumpet,770 then to trick up her house and to seek for guests, when her husband is gone a journey far off. Then ought she to be most solitary, and by abstaining from merry meetings, to show that there can be no greater damp to her mirth, then the absence of her husband.
- 770. Prov‸ 7:‸19.
7. Such as thinke their houſes a priſon vnto them, that cannot771 long tarrie at home: they thinke they haue power to goe when and whither they will, and to tarrie out as long as they liſt, thinke their husbands of it what they will.772 The Apoſtle layeth downe this as a marke of a wanton wife, and an idle houſe-wife, being idle (ſaith he) they goe about from houſe to houſe: therefore in773 another place he exhorteth them to be keepers at home. The Wiſe-man goeth further, and maketh this to be another note of a ſtrumpet, that774 her feet cannot abide in the houſe: which we may ſee verified in775 the Leuites adulterous wife, whoſe fearefull end was a ſtampe of Gods iudgement on ſuch looſe lewdneſſe.
7. Such as think their houses a prison unto them, that cannot771 long tarry at home: they think they have power to go when and whither they will, and to tarry out as long as they list, think their husbands of it what they will.772 The Apostle layeth down this as a mark of a wanton wife, and an idle house-wife, being idle (saith he) they go about from house to house: therefore in773 another place he exhorteth them to be keepers at home. The Wise-man goeth further, and maketh this to be another note of a strumpet, that her feet cannot abide in the house:774 which we may see verified in the Levites adulterous wife,775 whose fearful end was a stamp of God’s judgment on such loose lewdness.
8. Such as care not how or what they binde themſelues vnto776 without their husbands conſent, or knowledge: Herein eſpecially offend ſuch as being ſeduced by Ieſuites, Prieſts, or Friers, take the Sacrament, and thereupon by ſolemne vow and oath binde themſelues neuer to read an Engliſh Bible, nor any Proteſtants bookes, no nor to goe to any of their Churches, or to heare any of their Sermons: and ſuch moſt of all as enter into ſome Popiſh Nunnery, and vow neuer to returne to their husbands againe.
- 776. 8. Binding themſelues without conſent of huſband.
8. Such as care not how or what they bind themselves unto776 without their husbands consent, or knowledge: Herein especially offend such as being seduced by Jesuits, Priests, or Friars, take the Sacrament, and thereupon by solemn vow and oath bind themselves never to read an English Bible, nor any Protestants books, no nor to go to any of their Churches, or to hear any of their Sermons: and such most of all as enter into some Popish Nunnery, and vow never to return to their husbands again.
- 776. 8. Binding themselves without consent of husband.
Anſw. Aſſuredly ſhe was perſwaded that her husband would not be againſt it, and ſo had an implicit conſent: which may well be gathered, becauſe afterwards ſhe made it knowne to him, as both the778 name giuen to the childe, and779 that ſpeech of Annah, I will bring him that he may appeare before the Lord, and there abide for euer, and the anſwer of her husband,780 The Lord eſtabliſh his word, and781 his going vp with her when he was dedicated to the Lord, doe all ſhew.
Answ. Assuredly she was persuaded that her husband would not be against it, and so had an implicit consent: which may well be gathered, because afterwards she made it known to him, as both the778 name given to the child, and779 that speech of Hannah, I will bring him that he may appear before the Lord, and there abide for ever, and the answer of her husband, The Lord establish his word,780 and781 his going up with her when he was dedicated to the Lord, do all show.
Thus farre of the firſt branch of a wiues ſubmiſſion in abſtaining from doing things without her husbands conſent. The ſecond followeth, in doing the things which herequireth.
Thus far of the first branch of a wives submission in abstaining from doing things without her husbands consent. The second followeth, in doing the things which he requireth.