A Husband’s Providing for His Wife

An husband that tenderly reſpecteth his wife, but prouidently careth not for her, ſheweth more affection then diſcretion: he may haue a kinde heart, but he wants a wiſe head. How then can he be a good head vnto his wife? Some preſent contentment ſhe may haue by him: but ſmall profit and benefit can ſhe reape from him. Thoſe duties therefore which haue beene deliuered muſt be done, but theſe that follow muſt by no meanes be left vndone.

An husbands prouident care is noted in that office of Chriſt, wherein an husband reſembleth him, namely, to be a Sauiour of¹¹⁴³ the bodie, as hath beene¹¹⁴⁴ before declared. It conſiſteth

• 1. In prouiding things needfull for his wife.
• 2. In protecting her from things hurtfull.

1. 1143. Eph. 5. 23.
2. 1144. Treat. 1. §. 15. & Treat. 3. §. 73.

1. A carefull prouiding of things needfull, is a principall part of¹¹⁴⁵ that honour, which husbands are to giue vnto their wiues. For where the Apoſtle ſaith, that Elders are worthy of double honour,¹¹⁴⁶ he meaneth maintenance as well as reuerence. The Apoſtle counteth him worſe then an Infidell, that prouideth not for his owne, and ſpecially for thoſe of his owne houſe. Who are of an husbands houſe,¹¹⁴⁷ if not his wife? in his houſe, who more properly his owne, then his wife? If then an husband prouide not for his wife, what is he¹¹⁴⁸ to be accounted?

1. 1145. 1. Prouiding things needfull.
2. 1146. 1 Pet. 3. 7. 1 Tim. 5. 17. [moved in the edition]
3. 1147. 1 Tim. 5. 8. [moved in the edition]
4. 1148. Recordare quòd pater vxoris tāquam depoſitum quoddam filiam tibi tradidit, & omnibus relictis, matre, domo, & ſeipſo, omnem eius curā tuae dexterae commiſit. Chryſ. hō. 26. in 1. Cor. 11.

Great reaſon he ſhould prouide for her, becauſe he hath taken her from her parents and friends, and hath receiued that portion which they allotted her, and hath authoritie committed vnto him ouer her, and ſhe is put in ſubiection vnder him: her friends hauing giuen away her portion, and their power ouer her, and committed all to him, will take no further care for her: ſhe being in ſubiection vnder him cannot without him prouide for her ſelfe. Who then ſhall prouide for her if he doe not, whoſe wholy and only ſhe is?

p. 397 Contrary is their minde, who take a wife only for their owne¹¹⁴⁹ content, or delight, or gaine, and neuer thinke of that charge which together with a wife they take vpon them. According to their minde is their practiſe: for when they haue a wife they neglect her in euery thing but what may ſtand with their owne ends. Much haue they to anſwer for: and ſo much the more, becauſe a wife is an eſpeciall pledge of Gods fauour.¹¹⁵⁰

1. 1149. Contrary, to take a wife only for himſelfe.
2. 1150. Pro. 18. 22.

In this prouident care which an husband ought to haue of

his wife, we will conſider the Extent thereof.

Continuance

It ought to extend both to her ſelfe, and to others.

In regard of her ſelfe, to her Soule.

Body.

For her Soule, meanes of ſpirituall edification muſt be provided, and thoſe both priuate and publike. Priuate meanes, are¹¹⁵¹ holy and religious exerciſes in the houſe, as reading the word, praier, catechiſing, and ſuch like; which being the ſpirituall food of the ſoule are to be euery day, as our bodily food, prouided and vſed. An husband as a maſter of a family muſt provide theſe for the good of his whole houſe; but as an husband, in ſpeciall for the good of his wife: for to his wife, as well as to the whole houſe he is a King, a Prieſt, and a Prophet.

1. 1151. Priuate means of edification.

By himſelfe therefore, for his wiues good, ought he to performe theſe things, or to prouide that they may be done by ſome other. Craelius himſelfe performed thoſe exerciſes.¹¹⁵² Micah hired a Leuite (though his Idolatry were euill, yet his care to haue a Leuite in his houſe was commendable.) The¹¹⁵³ Shunemites husband prouided a chamber for the Prophet, and that eſpecially for his wiues ſake, for it was at her requeſt.

1. 1152. Act. 10. 2, 30. Iudg. 17. 10.
2. 1153. 2 King. 4. 11.

Publike meanes are the holy ordinances of God publikly¹¹⁵⁴ performed by Gods Miniſter. The care of an husband for his wife in this reſpect is, ſo to order his habitation, and prouide other needfull things, as his wife may be made partaker thereof. It is expreſly noted of Elkanah that he ſo prouided for his¹¹⁵⁵ wiues, that they went with him euery yeere to the houſe of God: the like is intimated of Ioſeph the husband of the virgin p. 398 Mary. In thoſe daies there was a publike place and houſe of God, whither all Gods people (how farre ſoeuer they dwelt from it) were to reſort euery yeere: the places where Elkanah and Ioſeph dwelt, were farre remote from the houſe of God, yet they ſo prouided, as not only themſelues, but their wiues alſo went to the publike worſhip of God. Now there are many houſes of God, places for the publike worſhip of God, but yet through the corruption of our times, the miniſtery of the word (the moſt principall meanes of ſpirituall edification) is not euery where to be enioyed: therefore ſuch ought an huſbands care for his wife in this reſpect to be, as to dwell where ſhe may haue the benefit of preaching the word, or elſe ſo to prouide for her, as ſhe may weekly goe where it may be had.

1. 1154. Publike meanes of edification.
2. 1155. 1 Sam. 1. 7. & 2. 19. Luk. 2. 41.

If men of wiſdome and abilitie make a purchaſe, or build an houſe for their habitation, they will be ſure it ſhall be where ſweet riuers and waters are, and good paſture ground, and where all needfull prouiſion may be had. Gods word preached is a ſpring of water of life; the place where it is preached a pleaſant, profitable paſture; all needfull prouiſion for the ſoule may there be had. Let this therefore be moſt of all inquired after: and no habitation ſetled but where this may be had.

Contrary is their practiſe, who hauing their calling in places where the word is plentifull, yet vpon outward reſpects of pleaſure, delight, eaſe, and profit, remoue their families into remote places where preaching is ſcarce, if at all; and there leaue their wiues to gouerne the family, not regarding their want of the word, for as much as they themſelues oft comming to London or other like places by reaſon of their calling, enioy the word themſelues. Many Citizens, Lawyers, and others are guiltie of great neglect of their wiues in this reſpect.

So alſo are they, who abandon all religious exerciſes out of their houſes, making their houſes rather ſtewes of the deuill, then Churches of God. If for want of meanes, either publike or priuate, a wife liue and die in ignorance, profaneneſſe, infidelitie, and impenitencie, which cauſe eternall damnation, p. 399 aſſuredly her bloud ſhall be required at his hands: for an huſband¹¹⁵⁶ is Gods watchman to his wife.

1. 1156. Ezek. 3. 18. &c.

To the body alſo muſt an husbands prouident care of his wife extend: and that both in health and ſickneſſe. In health by prouiding ſuch things as are needfull to preſerue health, as competent food, raiment, and the like neceſſaries. Where the¹¹⁵⁷ Prophet to aggrauate the miſery of the people ſaith, Seuen women ſhall take hold of one man, ſaying, We will eat our owne bread, and weare our owne apparell, only let vs be called by thy name, intimateth, that it was an husbands dutie to prouide bread and apparell, that is, all neceſſaries for his wife. Which the¹¹⁵⁸ law alſo implieth, where it inioyneth him that taketh one wife vpon another, not to diminiſh the food and raiment of the former. In ſickneſſe ſuch things are to be prouided as are needfull either to recouer her health, or to comfort, cheriſh and refreſh her in her ſickneſſe.

1. 1157. Jſa. 4. 1.
2. 1158. Exo. 21. 10.

This was¹¹⁵⁹ before noted among common mutuall duties; for by vertue of the matrimoniall bond it belongeth both to man and wife: but to the man it appertaineth by vertue of that power and charge which he hath ouer his wife: and therefore it was needfull here to be touched.

1. 1159. Treat. 2. Part. 2. §. 29.

Moſt proper to this place is that prouident care which huſbands ought to haue of their wiues both before and in the time of their trauell and child-bed: and that in two things eſpecially.

1. 1160. Treat. 3. §. 49. [moved in the edition]

1. In procuring for their wiues to the vttermoſt of their power and abilitie, ſuch things as may ſaue their longing, in caſe they doe long (as in all ages women in the time of breeding and bearing childe, haue beene ſubiect thereunto.) For it is well knowne, that it is very dangerous both for mother and childe to want her longing: the death ſometimes of the one, ſometimes of the other, ſometimes of both hath followed thereupon.

2. In prouiding ſuch things as are needfull for their trauell p. 400 and lying in childbed. This time is eſpecially to be prouided for, in many reſpects.

1. Becauſe it is a time of weakneſſe, wherein the woman cannot well prouide for her ſelfe.

2. Becauſe her weakneſſe is ioyned with much paine: the¹¹⁶¹ paine of a women in trauell is the greateſt paine that ordinarily is endured by any for the time: none know it ſo well as they that feele it: and many husbands becauſe they are not ſubiect thereto, thinke but lightly of it: but if we duly weigh¹¹⁶² that the holy Ghoſt when he would ſet forth the extremitie of any paines and pangs, reſembleth them to the paines of a woman in trauell, we may well gather, that of all they are the greateſt: which is further manifeſted by the ſcreekes and outcries which not only weake, and faint-hearted women vtter in the time of their trauell, but alſo are forced from the ſtrongeſt, and ſtouteſt women that be, and that though before hand they reſolue to the contrary. Neither may we wonder thereat; for their body is as it were ſet on a racke (if at leaſt the trauell be ſharpe) and all their parts ſo ſtretched, as a wonder it is they ſhould euer recouer their health and ſtrength againe: or that they ſhould hold out the brunt, and not die with their trauell, as Rachel, and the wife of Phinchas, and many in all ages haue¹¹⁶³ done. Surely among ordinary deliuerances I know none ſo neere a miracle, none wherein the Almighty doth ſo euidently manifeſt his great power and good prouidence, as in the ſafe deliuerie of women. Beſides the great pang of trauell, women are alſo after their deliuerie ſubiect to many after-throws which are very painfull. From all theſe paines and great weakneſſe which befalleth women in childbed, eſpecially if they nurſe their children, men by reaſon of their ſex are freed: Now then to apply this point, ſeeing women are brought to ſuch paines and weakneſſe in bringing forth thoſe children which are the mans as well as hers, and he freed from all; is it not very iuſt and meet that he ſhould prouide all things needfull for her welfare, eaſe, and recouery of ſtrength?

1. 1161. The paines of womens trauell.
2. 1162. Pſal. 48 6. Iſa. 13. 8. & 21. 3 Ier. 4. 31. & 30. 6. Mic. 49.
3. 1163. Gen. 35. 16, &c. 1 Sam. 4. 19. 20. [moved in the edition]

3. Becauſe the want of things needfull is at that time very dangerous: dangerous to the health and life of the woman and childe alſo.

Contrary to an husbands prouident care in generall are thoſe vices which were taxed in the treatiſe of common duties,¹¹⁶⁴ as grudging at the charges beſtowed on a wife: Couetouſneſſe, Prodigality, and Idleneſſe.

1. 1164. * See Treat 2. Part. 2. § 30. 39.

But contrary in particular to an husbands care for his wife in childbed, is the inhumane and more then barbarous vnkindneſſe of many husbands, who no whit conſider the weakneſſe of their wiues in this caſe, to helpe, eaſe, and comfort them, but rather make their burden much more heauy. For,

1. Some through couetouſneſſe refuſe before hand to afford meanes to their wife to prouide ſuch things as are needfull for her ſelfe and child: & when the time commeth, if their wife be deſirous of a Midwife that requireth ſomwhat more charges then ſhe that is next, ſhe ſhall haue none if ſhe will not haue the next. And as for a nurſe to tend her, they thinke their Maid will ſerue the turne wel enough: they need not be at the charges to bring a Nurſe into the houſe. In regard of conuenient lodging ſome will not ſticke to ſay, Cannot my wife be brought to bed in a roome without a chimney as well as the Virgin Mary? Why ſhould my wife need more things then ſhe did? Yea further there be many that whē the time that their wife ſhould be deliuered approacheth neere, carie her from al her friends into a place where ſhe is not knowne, leſt her friends ſhould by importunity draw him to expend and lay out more vpon his wife then he is willing. In the time while their wife is weake in childbed, many are loath to allow them any other diet then is for themſelues and children prouided in the houſe, not conſidering that her ſtomach cannot be like theirs.

Many other ſuch bitter fruits of vnkinde husbands ariſing from couetouſneſſe might be reckoned vp, whereby husbands plainely ſhew that they loue their wealth better then their wiues: they had rather loſe them, then part with that.

2. Others through iealous ſuſpicion forbeare not euen in¹¹⁶⁵ the time of their wiues paine and weakneſſe, to vpbraid them with lightneſſe, and to ſay that the childe is none of theirs. To lay this to a wiues charge vniuſtly, is at any time a moſt ſhamefull and odious reproach: but in the time of childebirth p. 402 whether iuſt or vniuſt, a thing too too ſpightfull and reuengefull. Some wiues are ſo farre ouercome thereby, (eſpecially in the time of their weakneſſe) as they are not able to beare it, but euen faint and die vnder the reproach: others more ſtout vow neuer to know their husbands againe. Many like miſchiefes follow on ſuch vnkindneſſe.

1. 1165. Si quid vxor peccauerit conſolare & noli moerorem augere. Chryſ. hom. 26. in 1 Cor. 11.

In an husbands prouiding for the body of his wife reſpect muſt be had to the meaſure, and to the manner.

1. 1166. Treat. 3. §. 38. [moved in the edition]

The meaſure muſt extend to his ability: for an husband ought to maintaine his wife in as good an eſtate and faſhion as himſelfe; by mariage ſhe is aduanced to as high an eſtate, and dignity in relation to others as he is: and for her owne vſe ſhe is made a partner of all his goods, and accordingly ought to partake thereof.

For the manner, he muſt ſuffer her (if at leaſt he obſerue her to haue any competent diſcretion) to order ſuch things as are needfull for her ſelfe according to her beſt liking: as Elkanah in another caſe ſaid to his wife, Doe what ſeemeth thee beſt.¹¹⁶⁷

1. 1167. 1 Sam. 1. 23.

Both in the meaſure and in the manner of prouiding, there muſt be a difference put betwixt a wife, and ſeruants or children. Theſe may haue their portions of meat, apparrell, and like neceſſaries, proportioned out and ſtinted vnto them, which is vnmeet to be done to a wife. Neither is it needfull that ſo plentifull a prouiſion be made for them as for her.

Contrary is an husbands nigardly dealing with his wife: when the allowance ſhe hath is both farre vnder his eſtate, and alſo ſo giuen her by little and little, as if ſhe were a childe. Many husbands make their wiues drudge at home, fare hardly, and goe meanly; who are themſelues braue in apparrell, frolicke in their feaſting abroad, and ſo exceed their wiues as they are aſhamed to be ſeene in company with them. They who marry their maids, or others of meaner ranke then themſelues, oft ſo deale with them: eſteeming them but as ſeruants and meane perſons though they be their wiues. But it hath beene¹¹⁶⁸ before ſhewed, that wiues by marriage are aduanced to their p. 403 husbands dignity, how meane ſoeuer they were before.

1. 1168. §. 6.

So farre ought the prouident care of an husband for his wife to extend, as ſhe may haue (beſide things needfull to her ſelfe) to beſtow on ſuch as it is requiſite for her to giue vnto: as namely, on children and ſeruants in the houſe, and others alſo out of the houſe. For ſo much is noted in Salomons deſcription¹¹⁷⁰ of a good wife; She giueth meat to her houſhold, and a portion to her maidens: all her houſhold is clothed with ſcarlet (namely, by her ordering and diſpoſing the matter.) Her children riſe vp and call her bleſſed, as for her generall cariage in the family, ſo for her particular fauours beſtowed on themſelues. As for¹¹⁷¹ others out of the houſe, it is alſo noted, that ſhe ſtretcheth out her hand to the poore, and reacheth forth her hands to the needie. Theſe things ſhe did by virtue of that power and liberty which her husband gaue her: as appeareth by two points there noted:

1. 1169. Treat. 3. §. 23. 29. 33. [moved in the edition]
2. 1170. Pro. 31. 15. &c. Verſ. 21. Uerſ. 28.
3. 1171. Verſ. 20.

1. In that before any mention is made of thoſe things¹¹⁷² which ſhe did, it is ſaid, The heart of her husband doth ſafely truſt in her.

1. 1172. Verſ. 11.

2. In that, after all her good deedes are reckoned vp, it is¹¹⁷³ ſaid, Her husband praiſeth her.

1. 1173. Uerſ. 28.

After this patterne it is meete that other husbands (whoſe wiues are wiſe and faithfull) ſhould deale with their wiues: that in the houſe they might haue the more honour of children and ſeruants: and that out of the houſe they might giue the better tryall of their charity.

For conſidering the many excellent promiſes that are made to workes of mercy and charity, and the many terrible threatnings that are denounced not onely againſt ſuch as exerciſe cruelty, but alſo againſt ſuch as ſhew no mercy: conſidering alſo that wiues together with their husbands, are heires of the¹¹⁷⁴ grace of life, it is very needfull yea euen neceſſary, that they ſhould manifeſt their faith by ſome worke of mercy and charity. Now vnleſſe her husband doe giue vnto her ſomething at her owne diſcretion to beſtow on others, true and through p. 404 try all of her mercifull and charitable minde cannot be made. If ſhe giue of that which her husband hath reſerued to himſelfe, as her giuing is vnlawfull, ſo ſhe may be thought liberall, not becauſe ſhe is mercifull, but becauſe notwithſtanding her liberality ſhe parteth with nothing of her owne: yea though ſhe haue a generall conſent to giue as ſhe ſeeth cauſe of the common goods of the family, yet is not that ſo ſure and ſound a tryall of her charity, and mercifulneſſe, as if ſhe had ſomething of her owne which ſhe might retaine or giue away as pleaſeth her ſelfe; and what ſhe giues not away, lay vp as her owne ſtocke proper to her ſelfe. For there is naturally ſuch a ſelfe loue in man, and a deſire to keepe that which is proper to ones ſelfe, that he is very loath to part with any of it, vnleſſe conſcience and grace alter this corruption of nature, and ſo moue him readily to lay out ſomething on charitable vſes. But otherwiſe of that which in whole or in part belongeth to another (be that other, husband, parent, maſter, friend, or any elſe) he is eaſily moued to be liberall and bountifull: a man will willingly cut a large thong (as we ſpeake) out of anothers leather.

1. 1174. 1 Pet. 3. 7.

It is knowne that many children and ſeruants, who, when they come to be poſſeſſers of their owne, are very niggards and miſers, haue beene liberall of their parents and maſters goods vnto the poore. Yea parteners in a ſtocke will be much more forward in giuing away that which is common with another, then that which is proper to each of them. The trueſt triall of a mercifull and charitable heart lieth in the diſtribution of that which is proper to ones ſelfe.

It is therefore meet vpon this very ground, that an husband ſhould according to his ability let his wife haue ſome ſtocke, and portion of her owne, free to her ſelfe to diſpoſe as ſhe ſeeth good: intimating vnto her that the principall end why he prouideth ſo plentifully for her, is, that ſhe may ſhew forth the fruits of her faith by ſome workes of charity: and exhorting her ſo to doe. Many religious, wiſe, kinde husbands thus doe: ſome giuing quarterly allowance in money to their wiues, others giuing their wiues power to receiue a certaine portion of rent out of certaine lands or houſes; others making p. 405 their wiues an abſolute eſtate of ſome inheritance, and ſuffering them to receiue the profits and reuenewes thereof; others giuing them certaine fees of their offices, or of their trade; others, that are poore, ſuffering them to worke for themſelues, & diſpoſe their earnings as they ſee cauſe: ſome one way, ſome another: euery one in his place beſt knoweth the meanes how to gratifie his wife in this kinde: it ſhall be ſufficient for me to haue laide downe the generall rule.

Contrary is their ſtrait-handedneſſe to their wiues, who allow them no more then may be for their owne priuat vſe. They thinke it a great matter and as much as an husband is bound to doe, to let her haue apparrell, meat and drinke, and ſuch neceſſaries as are befitting her ranke, but all other ouerplus they thinke needleſſe. Thus their wiues are not only depriued of meanes to gaine reſpect of their children and ſeruants at home, and to gratifie ſuch as are obedient and ready to doe ſeruice to them, but alſo to performe ſuch workes of mercie as both opportunity requireth, and alſo their conſcience moueth them to doe. Yea many wiues of rich huſbands are brought to great ſhame hereby, in that being in places where there is iuſt occaſion of contributing to ſome charitable vſe, and by reaſon of their rich and coſtly apparell it is expected they ſhould be bountiful, they haue not any thing at all to beſtow. The fault of ſome husbands in this reſpect is great many waies. As 1. in that they bring ſhame and griefe to their wiues, whom they ought with all tenderneſſe to reſpect. 2. In that they diſhonour their owne places: for they who take notice of this ſtraitneſſe to their wiues, will be ready to iudge them both couetous, and vnkinde. 3. The omitting of that worke of mercie which their wiues ſhould haue done ſhall be laid to their charge: they ſhall heare that dreadfull doome; Goe yee curſed into euerlaſting fire, for I was an hungred and yee fed me not &c. and if they anſwer, When ſaw we thee an hungred &c. it ſhall be replied, In that yee ſuffered not your wiues to doe it, you did it not.

Thus much of the extent of an husbands prouident care p. 406 for the good of his wife. It followeth to ſpeake of the continuance thereof.

The continuance of an husbands prouident care for his wife muſt be ſo long as ſhe liueth, yea though ſhe out-liue him: not that he can actually when he is dead prouide for her, but that he may before his death ſo prouide for her, as ſhe may haue wherewithall to maintaine her ſelfe, and to liue according to that place whereunto by him ſhe is aduanced: at leaſt that he leaue her not only ſo much as he had with her, but ſomething more alſo in teſtimony of his loue to her, and care for her. Husbands haue the example of Chriſt to preſſe this duty vpon them: for when he went away from his Church here on¹¹⁷⁵ earth, he left his ſpirit, which furniſhed it with gifts as plentifully, as if Chriſt had ſtill remained with her, if not more aboundantly.

1. 1175. Eph 4. 8. [moved in the edition]

For the better performance of this duty, husbands which die before the wiues, muſt obſerue among other things two eſpecially.

1. That plainly and expreſly they declare their minde and¹¹⁷⁶ will before they die, leſt their wiues ſhould be circumuented and defrauded of that which they intended them. Thus did Dauid vpon the motion of Bathſhebah, he ſetled his eſtate, and cauſed Bathſhebahs ſonne to be actually crowned before he himſelfe gaue vp the Ghoſt: which he did, as for other weighty reaſons, ſo in particular for his wiues good, as may be gathered from that reaſon ſhe alleaged to the King in theſe¹¹⁷⁷ words; Elſe when my Lord the King ſhall ſleepe-with his fathers, I ſhall be reputed vile.

1. 1176. Husbands before they die muſt make their will euen for their wiues good.
2. 1177. 1 King. 1. 21. Husbands on their deathbed muſt commend their wiues to ſome faithfull friend. Iob. 19 26, 27. Reaſon. Trueſt triall of loue at departure.

2. That he requeſt ſome faithfull friend in his ſteed to be an helper vnto her; (as Chriſt commended his mother vnto his diſciple Iohn) which will be needfull in regard of her weakneſſe, by reaſon of her ſex, and want of experience to manage ſuch affaires eſpecially as are out of the houſe.

At the time of a mans departure out of this world from his wife, will the trueſt triall of his affection to his wife be giuen: for many that beare their wiues faire in hand while they liue p. 407 with them, at their death ſhew that there was no ſoundneſſe of affection in their heart towards them: all was but a meere ſhew for ſome by-reſpects.

Contrary are diuers practiſes of vnkinde husbands. For¹¹⁷⁸

1. 1178. Contrary. 1. A wilfull inability.

1. Some through improuidence, vnthriftineſſe and prodigality, diſable themſelues from doing good to their wiues after their death; and ſo leaue their wiues nothing, or (that which is worſe then nothing) in debt, and with a great charge of children. That care which husbands ought to haue of their wiues ſhould make them thinke before hand of the time to come, and euen for their wiues ſake be ſome-what the more diligent, thrifty, and prouident, and cut off many vnneceſſary expences, elſe their ſinne is doubled. 1. By a needleſſe waſting their eſtate. 2. By neglecting their wiues.

2. Others by fawning, or forcing meanes draw their wiues¹¹⁷⁹ to yeeld vp that intereſt they haue in money, goods, houſe or land by ioynter, inheritance, or any other way, and yet make them no ſufficient recompence in another kinde: but at their death leaue their wiues in a farre worſe eſtate then they were in before mariage, beſide a greater charge then they had before. As this is a great part of vnkindneſſe, ſo alſo a maine point of iniuſtice.

1. 1179. 2 Making away their wiues ioynter, or any other right.

3. Others grudging againſt the lawes vnder which they¹¹⁸⁰ liue for prouiding for a wife by thirds or otherwiſe, vſe all the fraudulent meanes they can to depriue her of that which otherwiſe the law would lay vpon her. The ciuill politique awes of the place where we liue ought to be the rule of our ciuill actions (ſo farre as they are not repugnant to Gods word) and we ought for conſcience ſake to be ſubiect vnto¹¹⁸¹ them. Beſides an husband ought (though the law forced him not) to leaue at leaſt the thirds to his wife, as a teſtimony of his loue to her, and care for her: ſo as this alſo is a double fault. 1. A tranſgreſſion of the law. 2. A note of vnkindneſſe.

1. 1180. 3. Defeating of thirds.
2. 1181. Rom. 13. 5.

4. Orthers hauing aged and ſickly wiues, or otherwiſe¹¹⁸² thinking that their wiues may, or rather hoping that their wiues will die before themſelues, put off the making of their p. 408 wills of purpoſe that they might not put in their wiues thirds, but diſpoſe them ſome other way. Beſides that theſe husbands ſhew no good affection towards their wiues, they prouoke God to diſappoint them of their hopes: and ſo he doth often-times: for he taketh them away before their wiues, and ſo taketh them away, as hauing no time to make their will, not only their wiues enioy their thirds (which they ſo much deſired to auoid) but alſo ſome other (whom of all in their life time they miſliked) ſeaze vpon the other two parts.

1. 1182. 4. Making no will.

Hauing ſhewed how an husband is to prouide things needfull for his wife: It remaineth to ſhew how he is to protect her from things hurtfull.

In regard of that protection which an husband oweth his wife, he is called the veile of her eies: which phraſe as it implieth¹¹⁸³ Subiection on the wiues part, ſo alſo Protection on the huſbands: to protect one, is as it were, to couer them, namely, from danger; to be negligent and careleſſe of them, is, as it were, to lay them open to danger. The ſame duty is implied vnder another like phraſe of ſpreading his wing ouer his wife.¹¹⁸⁴ The metaphor is taken from winged fowles, which to keepe their young ones from hurt, vſe to ſpread their wings ouer them: this phraſe and metaphor is alſo attributed to God, to¹¹⁸⁵ ſet forth his protection.

1. 1183. Gen. 20 16. [moved in the edition]
2. 1184. Ruth 3. 9.
3. 1185. Ruth 2. 12.

But moſt pertinent to this purpoſe is the title,¹¹⁸⁶ Saniour, giuen to an husband in relation to his wife.

1. 1186. Treat. 1. §. 15. and treat. 3. §. 73.

For this end the Lord who ſubiected a woman vnto her husband, gaue to his ſexe greater ſtrength, courage and boldneſſe then to hers, that he might protect her which is the weaker veſſell. In this duty of protection Chriſt ſheweth himſelfe an excellent patterne and preſident vnto husbands.

The better to performe this dutie, an husband muſt bee carefull,

1. To preuent, as much as he may, ſuch dangers as his wiſe is like to fall into.

2. To recouer her out of ſuch as ſhe is fallen into.

For this purpoſe did Dauid carry his wiues into Gath, leſt, if¹¹⁸⁷ they were left in Iſrael, Saul ſhould worke them ſome miſchiefe: p. 409 and againe, when they were taken by the Amalakites, he recouered¹¹⁸⁸ them.

1. 1187. 1 Sam. 27. 3. [moved in the edition]
2. 1188. & 30. 18.

According to that danger whereunto wiues are ſubiect, muſt an husbands care of protecting his wife be manifeſted.

1. If ſhe be in danger to be ſeduced and inticed, as Euah was,¹¹⁸⁹ by any euill inſtruments of the deuill, as Ieſuits, Prieſts, Friers, profane, blaſphemous, laſciuious, or riotous perſons; his care muſt be either to keepe them away that they come not at her, or to put them away from her ſo ſoone as he can: he may not ſuffer them to harbour in his houſe.

1. 1189. A wife muſt be kept from being ſeduced.

2. If by any ſleight ſhe be drawne from his houſe, he muſt¹¹⁹⁰ ſeeke her, and fetch her againe, as the Leuite did his wife: or cauſe her (if he can) to be brought home againe, as Dauid cauſed Michal to be brought: eſpecially if they be taken away by force, as Ahinoam, and Abigail, Dauids wiues, were.

1. 1190. A wiſe ſtolne away muſt be fetched home. Iudg. 19. 2. 2 San. 3. 13, 14. 1 Sam. 30. 18. A wiues credit muſt be maintained.

3. If ſhe be vniuſtly ſlandered, he is to maintaine her credit and reputation as much as his owne: as Chriſt accounteth himſelfe deſpiſed, when his Church is, ſo muſt he. This care muſt he¹¹⁹¹ haue of his wiues credit, euen after her death, as well as while ſhe liueth.

1. 1191. See Treat. 2. Part 2. §. 31. &c.

4. What other miſchiefe ſo euer is intended or practiſed againſt¹¹⁹² her, he muſt be a tower of defence to protect her, (as Ahoſhueroſh was to Eſter againſt Haman) and that not only againſt ſtrangers without the houſe, but alſo againſt children and ſeruants in the houſe. Children growne to yeeres, that are ſtout and ſtubborne, will be ready to riſe vp againſt their mother, eſpecially if ſhe be a mother in law, becauſe ſhe is the weaker ſex: the countenance of a father for the moſt part keepeth moſt in awe. Wherefore the husband muſt be an helpe to his wife, and maintaine her honour againſt them: yea though they be children of a former wife.

1. 1192. Luke 10. 16. A wife muſt be defended againſt ſtrangers, ſeruants, and children. Eſt. 7. 7, 8. &c.

Obiect. Mothers in law often proue vnkinde, and vniuſt ſtepmothers, and deale vnmercifully with their husbands children: muſt an husband in ſuch caſes aſſiſt his wife againſt his children?

Anſw. The protection, I ſpeake of, is in caſe a wife be wronged, then her husband is to doe what he can to right her (as we ſpeake.) But if ſhe be the wrong-doer, he may by no meanes boulſter p. 410 her vp againſt his children, and ſo make their wrong the greater. Yet ſo far ought he to reſpect his wife, as by all the faire meanes he can, to labour to pacific her minde, and turne her heart towards them: and if he obſerue her heart to be cleane alienated from them, then to put them forth to be brought vp in ſome other place, and ſo to take away from her the obiect of her diſpleaſure, that he and ſhe may liue more quietly together. For if a man muſt forſake father and mother, he muſt alſo forſake children, and cleaue to his wife. Peace and vnitie betwixt man and wife muſt of all other be kept inuiolable. Though thou caſt away¹¹⁹³ all, nothing can happen more troubleſome to thee then not to haue a quiet wife at home. Thou canſt finde no ſinne more grieuous then to haue contention with a wife.

1. 1193. Licèt omnia proijcias, nihil moleſtius continget quàm non habere beneuolam domi vxorem: peccatum nullum magis dolendum inueneris, quàm cum vxore ſeditionem habere. Chryſoſt. hō. 26. in 1. Cor. 11. Geneſ. 16. 6. & 21. 14.

If a wife muſt be maintained againſt the ſtubbornneſſe of children, much more againſt the inſolencie of ſeruants: for which purpoſe the example of Abraham is recorded, whoſe ſeruant might haue a priuiledge aboue others, becauſe he had made her his bedfellow; yet when ſhe waxed inſolent againſt her miſtreſſe, firſt he put her into her miſtreſſes hand to doe to her as it pleaſed her; and afterwards he caſt her out of his houſe.

Contrary is a diſſolute careleſneſſe of husbands, who care no more to helpe and ſuccour their wiues then any other.

1. Some more feare to offend their wiues then they care to doe¹¹⁹⁴ them good, and in that reſpect they let any ſort of people come to their wiues that are welcome to them. If Magiſtrates in a Common-wealth ſhall anſwer for ſuffering ſeducers to come into their dominions to deceiue their people, much more ſhall husbands anſwer for ſuffering them to come and deceiue their wiues.

• 1. Becauſe they haue a greater charge ouer their wiues then Magiſtrates ouer their people.
• 2. Becauſe wiues ought to be dearer to husbands then people to Magiſtrates.
• 3. Becauſe they may ſooner eſpie them in their houſe, then Magiſtrates in the Common-wealth.
• 4. Becauſe they may be much more eaſily kept out of an houſe, then out of a Common-wealth, or a Citie.

1. 1194. Contrary, Diſſolute careleſneſſe. 1. In ſuffering ſeducers to come to the houſe.

2. Others care not whither their wiues wander: and if they¹¹⁹⁵ p. 411 doe goe out of their houſe, they ſhall neuer be ſought after by their¹¹⁹⁶ husbands: though this may be a iuſt puniſhment on wandring wiues, yet is it not iuſt for husbands ſo to deale with them. If Chriſt our husband ſhould ſo deale with vs, we ſhould ſoone be loſt: for wee oft goe aſtray like wandring ſheepe, but hee is that good ſhepherd, who ſeeketh after the loſt ſheepe vntill he¹¹⁹⁷ finde it.

1. 1195. 2. In ſuffering [dropped from the edition]
2. 1196. wiues to goe whither they liſt. [moved in the edition]
3. 1197. Luke 15. 4.

3. No maruell then that many husbands are no more affected¹¹⁹⁸ with the ill reports and rumors raiſed againſt their wiues, when they ſo little regard who come to them, or whither they goe. Aſſuredly the diſcredit of a wife will turne to the mans diſhonour: for as a vertuous wife is a crowne to her husband, ſo by the¹¹⁹⁹ rule of contraries, an infamous wife is a ſhame to her husband. If therefore not for his wiues ſake, yet for his owne ſake a man ought not too careleſly paſſe ouer the ill reports which are raiſed againſt his wife.

1. 1198. 3. In not regarding ill reports of wiues.
2. 1199. Pro. 12. 4. [moved in the edition]

4. There be ſuch vnkinde husbands as are moued with no ill¹²⁰⁰ vſage done vnto their wiues, nor will heare any complaint that they make vnto them: yea if they ſee them miſuſed, they will either not ſeeme to ſee it, or but ſmile at it, and ſo goe their way, and ſuffer their wiues to right themſelues as well as they can. As this beſeemeth not any Chriſtian to ſuffer his neighbour to be wronged, (for it is noted as a commendable matter in Moſes, that¹²⁰¹ when he ſaw two Hebrewes ſtriuing together, he tooke his part that had wrong done to him, and reproued the other) ſo much leſſe an husband, to whoſe ſafe-guard his wife is committed. Nature teacheth vs that the head is as much affected with a wrong done to the bodie, as to it ſelfe: ſo ought an husband.¹²⁰²

1. 1200. 4. In ſuffering wiues to be miſuſed.
2. 1201. Exod. 2. 13.
3. 1202. 5. In boulſtring vp children or ſeruants againſt wiues.

5. As the wrong which is done by thoſe who are in ſubiection in the houſe vnder the wife, is greater then that which is done by strangers: ſo is the husbands fault the greater in ſuffering it: for he hath more power ouer them in his houſe, then ouer others.¹²⁰³ What then may we thinke of ſuch, as either by their conniuence, or by taking part againſt their wiues, ſuffer both children and ſeruants to inſult ouer them? Aſſuredly thoſe husbands themſelues will finde ſome ſmacke of the bitter and euill fruit thereof: and that not only by that great diſcontent which their wiues muſt needs take thereat; but alſo by that contempt which will follow p. 412 on their owne perſons, both by their wiues (who cannot thinke them meet heads to gouerne others) but alſo by their children and ſeruants, who thereby will take occaſion to waxe proud, and preſumptuous againſt him. By deſpiſing the weaker, men grow by little and little to deſpiſe the ſtronger. This men of wiſdome and experience well know: whereupon in Common-wealths and Policies gouerned by wiſe men, the authoritie of inferiour Magiſtrates is vpheld and maintained: ſuperiour Magiſtrates will not ſuffer them who are in authoritie vnder them to be deſpiſed: for it is well knowne, that it tends not to the honour and eaſe only, but to the ſafetie alſo of the ſupreme Magiſtrate, to haue the power and authoritie of inferiour Magiſtrates reſpected, and not trampled vnder feet. It argueth therefore both want of affection, and of diſcretion and vnderſtanding in husbands, to ſuffer childe, ſeruant, or any other in the houſe, to inſult ouer their wiues, who are ioynt gouernours with them ouer the houſe.

1. 1203. Si illam quae ſecundum poſt te locum obtinet contumelia afficis, non parum tui principatus honori derogas. Chryſ. loc. cit.